Negotiating with Borderline Personality

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is often first recognized in young adulthood. It can result in rapid mood swings, broken relationships, impulsive actions, and various forms of self-destruction, from cutting to suicide. Despite the progress being made with various treatment strategies, few books have sought to explore the inner experience of those suffering from BPD and make their experiences understandable. While the use of a treatment contract between the patient and her therapist has become familiar to secure a stable therapeutic alliance, a broader use of contract principles to help those with BPD to frame and contain their feelings, impulses, and goals has not been sufficiently explored. By approaching BPD directly and applying negotiation principles attorney Thomas Mengert has provided a way of applying legal theory to this puzzling condition. By seeking the greater good of all parties through a negotiation process with clarity in cause and consequence, much of the chaos of Borderline lives can be avoided. For people with BPD, daily life is like encountering a complex obstacle course for a living but one that can be successfully negotiated and navigated through an understanding of the often hair-trigger alert status and extreme nature of borderline defenses. Over time the desperation of borderline lives can yield insight and foresight through negotiation in order to achieve inner peace and freedom from pain. The book, written by an attorney, Thomas Mengert, explores Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) from a unique legal perspective. Persons with BPD may encounter the legal system at many levels, such as family law hearings (divorce or child custody), criminal infractions, bankruptcy, hospitalization, and other instances where the unfortunate life events stemming from their illness may lead them to encounter the legal system. The author does not aim to discuss these diverse encounters with the legal system in detail. Instead, he uses his legal habit of mind to elucidate the condition of BPD itself rather than exploring its multiple manifestations and consequences. The author suggests that the customary modes of thought of an attorney might be of use in the realm traditionally assigned to psychology. If BPD is approached from the standpoint of the way that lawyers are trained to look at things, perhaps new insights might emerge. The author also discusses the concept of the obligation to negotiate in good faith, a habit of law, and how it relates to BPD. The author mentions that much of the thinking and work of the law is dedicated to assessing and allocating risks of loss and devising remedial measures when losses occur. The real-world approach to BPD taken in this book is similar to the tasks that lawyers must face each day. The author emphasizes that this book is an impressionistic study written by an attorney and not as an attorney. It does not offer legal advice or therapeutic treatment manual, or professional expertise.